Ungathered Thoughts
I can be really influenced by the people around me. I wish it was the opposite. I end up looking like whoever it is I spend most time with. Why is that? If I was spending lots of time with God, I guess it would be a good thing. But alas, this is not the case.
Some people have the ability of killing my enthusiasm. It's weird. They'll just say a couple things and my once high heart sinks low into my soles. Then I'm in a funk for the rest of the day. I don't know if it's my constant search for approval or their lack of encouaragement. Probably a mix of both.
I can't wait to go to the States. I am nervous, because who knows where I will be living and how I'll be earning. But I can't wait to be in a new, stimulating environment. There isn't much here that "stimulates" me. I used to be so into photography, so into music, so into writing. Now, I just go through my days with hollow passion and a shrinking capacity for dreams.
I wish I understood what it really meant to follow Jesus. That it is not just a simple add-on to life. I want to live in Christian community, I want to be challenged every day to live completely surrendered to Him. I don't feel very faithful to Him these days.
Some people have the ability of killing my enthusiasm. It's weird. They'll just say a couple things and my once high heart sinks low into my soles. Then I'm in a funk for the rest of the day. I don't know if it's my constant search for approval or their lack of encouaragement. Probably a mix of both.
I can't wait to go to the States. I am nervous, because who knows where I will be living and how I'll be earning. But I can't wait to be in a new, stimulating environment. There isn't much here that "stimulates" me. I used to be so into photography, so into music, so into writing. Now, I just go through my days with hollow passion and a shrinking capacity for dreams.
I wish I understood what it really meant to follow Jesus. That it is not just a simple add-on to life. I want to live in Christian community, I want to be challenged every day to live completely surrendered to Him. I don't feel very faithful to Him these days.
posted by Thais at 4:49 AM
2 Comments:
1. how do you like A Generous Orthodoxy? good stuff.
2. i just made a second blog, and it's actually on blogspot. filotheos.blogspot.com
3. i love my friend, Thais.
It seems to me that you are more focused or at least trying to be focused on God more than many people I know. When you miss an occasion, don't dwell on your failure. Your heart has been broken for the lost, God will use you no matter what. Pick yourself up gal!
Know yourself
Be yourself
Temet Nosce. Carpe Diem.
Joey
Post a Comment
<< Home