Encouraged

Someone that I totally respect told me I should lead worship, because it's in me apparently.
It was so encouraging to hear that.
Without realising it, I'd sort of given up the thought of leading worship. I don't really know why. I guess I just didn't feel musically adequate at all (still feel that way). I felt like "who am I to lead people in worship?".
But maybe God wants me to do it anway.
Because I really LOVE it when people worship in spirit and in truth. And if He can use me to get someone there, then why not!?

Isaiah 58

I have been thinking a lot about social justice recently. Does God call every Christian and every church to it? I know I have a growing conviction about it. But who are "the poor"? Do we all need to be reaching out to the economically poor, or is caring for the relationally and spiritually poor just as worthy? I don't have an answer yet... But I read Isaiah 58 again this morning. I think this is one of my favourite passages of all time. Wow.

Your Prayers Won't Get Off the Ground
1"Shout! A full-throated shout!
Hold nothing back--a trumpet-blast shout!
Tell my people what's wrong with their lives,
face my family Jacob with their sins!
2They're busy, busy, busy at worship,
and love studying all about me.
To all appearances they're a nation of right-living people--
law-abiding, God-honoring.
They ask me, "What's the right thing to do?'
and love having me on their side.
3But they also complain,
"Why do we fast and you don't look our way?
Why do we humble ourselves and you don't even notice?'
"Well, here's why:
"The bottom line on your "fast days' is profit.
You drive your employees much too hard.
4You fast, but at the same time you bicker and fight.
You fast, but you swing a mean fist.
The kind of fasting you do
won't get your prayers off the ground.
5Do you think this is the kind of fast day I'm after:
a day to show off humility?
To put on a pious long face
and parade around solemnly in black?
Do you call that fasting,
a fast day that I, GOD, would like?

6"This is the kind of fast day I'm after:
to break the chains of injustice,
get rid of exploitation in the workplace,
free the oppressed,
cancel debts.
7What I'm interested in seeing you do is:
sharing your food with the hungry,
inviting the homeless poor into your homes,
putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad,
being available to your own families.
8Do this and the lights will turn on,
and your lives will turn around at once.
Your righteousness will pave your way.
The GOD of glory will secure your passage.
9Then when you pray, GOD will answer.
You'll call out for help and I'll say, "Here I am.'
"If you get rid of unfair practices,
quit blaming victims,
quit gossiping about other people's sins,

A Full Life in the Emptiest of Places
10If you are generous with the hungry
And start giving yourselves to the down--and-out,
Your lives will begin to glow in the darkness,
your shadowed lives will be bathed in sunlight.
11I will always show you where to go.
I'll give you a full life in the emptiest of places--
firm muscles, strong bones.
You'll be like a well-watered garden,
a gurgling spring that never runs dry.
12You'll use the old rubble of past lives to build anew,
rebuild the foundations from out of your past.
You'll be known as those who can fix anything,
restore old ruins, rebuild and renovate,
make the community livable again.
13"If you watch your step on the Sabbath
and don't use my holy day for personal advantage,
If you treat the Sabbath as a day of joy,
GOD's holy day as a celebration,
If you honor it by refusing "business as usual,'
making money, running here and there--
14Then you'll be free to enjoy GOD!
Oh, I'll make you ride high and soar above it all.
I'll make you feast on the inheritance of your ancestor Jacob."

Heartache

My favourite coworker asked me today if I'd ever cheated on someone. I said no.
She told me she never had either, but only because she just couldn't. Not because she hadn't tried...
She then went on to tell me she's not happy with her boyfriend. She doesn't really know why she's with him. But she doesn't want to leave him, even though she has many reasons to.
He has cheated on her many times. She says they should never have stayed together for even a week. They've been together for six years now.
She says she doesn't want to hurt him by leaving him.
She says that at least the sex is good.

I don't know about you, but this breaks my heart. Really.
Is this life without God?

I wish I could talk to her about the purpose and joy God can give to life.
I wish I could show her that she is worth respect.
I wish I could change life for her.

So I guess this is where all I have is prayer.
So pray, I will.

Challenged by Rob Bell

"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander." 1 Peter 3:15-16

When was the last time someone asked you to give them a reason for the hope that you have?
Peter assumed that the Way of Jesus would be so different, so counter-culture, so against the grain. That these people who had commited to eachother and to Jesus would be living in such a way that the world around them would constantly be asking "why?". Why do you care? Why do you serve me like this? Why are you listening to me?
If your mouth were duck-taped shut, would we still know that you're a Christian? If our church was ducktaped from being able to say anything, would the larger community still say "those people are an unquestionable force for good. Why do they live like this?"
- taken from a sermon by Rob Bell.

Jeanne

I love my sister.
And I wish I could put into words how much.
But I can't.
Our friendship in itself is a testimony to God's goodness.
I don't know what else to add, really.

Thinking Out Loud.

I just finished reading Dan Kimball's chapter on Leadership in his book "The Emerging Church". I really liked it. I realise that I know a lot of leaders who are "pastoral" more than they are "executive". They are, in fact, the ones I love and aspire to be like, which only reminds me that is there no need for me to "be postmodern" - I naturally am and I respond to those who are.
I think God is working on my critical spirit. I think that being overly critical is really a sign of being unsure of who you are and what you believe about something. It has been for me anyways.
The bottom line is, I just need to be who and what I am. It has become engrained in me for some time to react to certain terms and certain ways of doing things or certain books as if I am reacting to an allergy. But where's the need for that? I hate people who do that, and here I am, being what I hate!
I have been praying for my heart to be broken - broken by the state of this world, broken by people who are unhappy, broken by the same things that break God's heart. I know that will move me towards prayer much more than anything else will. And may humility accompany all of it.

boiler rooms

simply amazing

It is scary and unnerving how much this

echoes

with my heart.

$$$

Wow. My Masters will cost me at least $25 344.
That is A LOT of money.
Overwhelming.
But an opportunity to put my faith in the Provider...
Help!

Small Group

It is so GOOD to read Scripture with your friends.
So GOOD to worship through song.
So GOOD to share stories of what's God been doing in our lives.
So GOOD to laugh and eat and joke around.

Life feels like it's getting a bit more "back together" again.

Thank You, Jesus.

P.S.

Please be praying for and about the G8 Summit,

no matter how cynical you may be about it...

Thanks.

Sometimes I feel like I'm an annoying Christian. I start wondering why I can't be satisfied with normal things like The Purpose Driven Life and Hillsong Australia and the "sinner's prayer"?
Am I being judgemental? Self-righteous? Really, what is my problem? Do I lack grace? And why does everything have to be in line with the way I think? I should be able to see the good in all things, shouldn't I? Why do I always want something different? What is it that I want, even?

Costly Grace.
Discipleship.
Authenticity.
Sacrifice.
Worship.
Service.
Passion.
Truth.
Jesus.

I don't know how to channel my frustration. I don't even know exactly what I'm frustrated with. But I don't want to be the criticial one who is never satisfied. The one who's always tearing everyone and everything down. I need to ask God to give me His vision for things. And if the frustration is from Him, then I need to ask Him to help me change those things while I reach for greater knowledge of Him... I also need to repent from pride and self-righteousness. I really do...

Clear the stage and set the sound and lights ablaze
If that's the measure that it takes to crush the idols.
Chuck the pews and all the decorations too
Until the congregations few then have revival.
Tell your friends that this is where the party ends
until you're broken for your sins you can't be social.
Then seek the Lord and wait for what he has in store
and know that great is your reward and just be hopeful

Cause you can sing all you want to.
Yes you can sing all you want to
you can sing all you want to
And don't get me wrong, worship is more than a song.

Take a break from all the plans that you made
And sit at home alone and wait for God to whisper.
Beg Him please to open up his mouth and speak
And pray for real upon your knees until they blister.
Shine the light on every corner of your life
Until the pride and lust and lies are in the open.
Then read the word and put to test the things you've heard
Until your heart and soul are stirred and rocked and broken.

Cause you can sing all you want to.
Yes you can sing all you want to
you can sing all you want to
And don't get me wrong, worship is more than a song.

Anything I put before my God is an idol.
Anything I want with all my heart is an idol.
Anything I can't stop thinking of is an idol.
Anything that I give all my love is an idol.
We must not worship something that's not even worth it.
Clear the stage and make some space for the one who deserves it.

"Clear The Stage", Ross King