What?!

The one year bible is having me read through the book of Romans right now. I'm reminded how much i really don't get this whole predestination thing. It makes me want stop being a Christian. I do not understand how God can create people just as objects of wrath (Romans 9:13-24). I understand that a potter has the right to create some pots for decoration and some for trash. But pots don't have souls or feelings or hearts or tears.
How can God call some to Himself while He lets others' hearts harden?

How can i trust - really trust - a God like that???

The answers i want to give myself are:
- look at Jesus - He radically loved everyone. Preoccupy yourself with following his teachings and imitating his life.
- His ways are not your ways. Trust that God is good, even though it may seem completely foolish.
- "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God."

But still, I am highly bothered. This seems to be the thorn in my side, the one that keeps coming back...